It's my birfday...

So my son and I went to hugedale to shop. Why? Because I'm a glutton for punishment. Everything was fairly normal...spandex maxed out, cheap jewelry, Meximullets, and prosti-tots.

Then, we went to Hot Topic. Half the people in the store had dual lip piercings. I have never seen this...it was new and different! So me, being a total dumb-ass, had to ask a couple of the employees with these different piercings what the 411 was on the whole lower lip holey thing.

It's called the snake-bite. It has no point and it's the new trend. I was hoping for so much more.

So, in the end, Jack got new jeans, I got some new tank tops to replace my nasty gyms ones, and Jack got his lip pierced.

It was a good day.

Saturday night...

I just lost a toenail and Jack says my toe looks like ham. 

I’m currently mourning the loss of cute toes in pretty colors peeking out from sassy strappy sandals that match my business suits.  

What the Hell…it’s strappy sandal season!  This is just so wrong on so many levels. 

See, I ran a marathon a week ago and losing toenails is apparently normal.  So are blisters on your toes. 

I called some of my athlete friends and they (unfortunately, all men) basically couldn’t figure out why I was upset about losing a toenail. 

None of them wear sandals to work, nor have any of them ever had a sassy pedicure. 

I can feel my heartbeat in my gimpy toe. 

So, I did a bunch of things wrong on Marathon day…I forgot to take my ibuprofen, I didn’t walk through the first water stops and almost drowned myself, and I didn’t lube my feet with Aquaphor (never even heard of it until just before the marathon).  I also didn’t train long enough.  4 weeks is not long enough.

I finished, though, and got my jacket.  I ran 26.2 miles in 4 hours and 4 minutes and I have the blisters to prove it.

Sunday night...

I threw in the towel this morning and went in and got a round of antibiotics and Tylenol with codine.  It's already working and I can't feel my heartbeat in my gimpy toe anymore.

People keep asking if I'm going to run another marathon and I keep saying, "no".  I realize it's petty, but I'm not willing to give up toenails to run.  I'll stick with my 11 milers around the lakes on the weekend and I'm doing a half marathon in the fall.  I don't lose my sassy pedicure that way.

6:58am, just before the gun.

Somewhere around mile 17...I was still on pace, although the blister had started 9 miles prior...

Running to the finish...11:04am

Go Amy, go!!

Jack was there to greet a very tired Mom.

It looks like a half eaten hot dog under that bandage, so just use your imagination.

That's the blister that started at mile 8.  I ran 18 miles on that bad boy and it just goes to prove that I'm an idiot.

But, I got my jacket.

Tomorrow is the big day...

I'm going to run 26.2 miles.

Wow, I'm nuts.

I tried to go to yoga this morning, but my teacher is on some retreat so we were thrust into a pilates class.  This poor girl next to me asked, "why are things so different?"

"Um, because you're blond."

Ok, no, I didn't really say that.

But, I'm carb loading and eating chocolate cake.

Mmmmm, cake.

I told Todd to take pictures tomorrow because I picked out a special outfit that almost rivals those dumb-ass biking ensembles. 

I'm doing a marathon in a skirt...

and capri tights.

Another 18 miles today...

I ran it in 2 hours and 35 minutes, which is 10 faster than last week.

It was less painful and seemed less far...I think because we had more water stops.

I've been pretty sore all week, so I would like to take this moment to thank the ibuprofen and caffeine Gods for making today's run possible.  Without you, I never would have done it.

Thank you for your support...

I think I'll go stretch...

...or nap...

Wow, 18 miles is far...

Then, I thought I should grocery shop and go to Macy's.

So now, it's about 6 hours after I stopped running and I haven't really sat down since...

I think my butt just grew into this chair.

Did I mention 18 miles is really far?

 

My name is Amy and I'm...

a runner.

I just registered for my first marathon.

May 31st, 2009

May I drag my old ass across the finish line in one piece.

http://www.teamortho.us/Minneapolis_Marathon

I am woman, hear me scream for ibuprofen.

Ok, I really just want the jacket.

Happy Easter!

The Easter bunny brought all sorts of fun treats for Jack this year!

And Jack got his very own fancy bathrobe.

I, on the other hand, ran 9.5 miles and the last one was with Jack. He's going to take up running. After his meltdown 3 blocks into the run, he did great! We have a lot to work on about technique, stride, and pace, but I think Jack will do awesome!

If you can't find a good running partner, bribe your kids into it.

Did I mention Jack got a trench coat and combat boots this weekend?

I'll provide pictures soon...Tatters is his new favorite store.

What did I get? A new smurf patch for my running coat.

Seriously smurfy.

So...my dad sent me this picture saying it reminded him of Jack's Halloween photo...

I would say the resemblance is frightening...

I went out to run 7 miles...I figured I cash out after 4.

I ran 8!!

Rock on!!

Wait...I think this moment needs a very special photo...

My 11 year old son sold his Nintendo DS and all of the games he had to go with it and bought an iPod Touch.

It's really Star Trek like in it's possibilities which we are too dense to understand. He's still all about the dorky games he can download for free.

Within 24 hours of said new toy coming home, I was at the iStore trying to figure out how to block some of his Internet access. I just now realized I sent him to his father's for 5 days with the damn thing unlocked.

Sigh...

I guess I have to trust in the fact he TOLD me, no PROMISED me, he would not surf porn on his free WiFi.

Did I mention that he has learned to hack the computers at school?

There are bets going at work to see how long it takes him to break through my 4 digit code.


I'm being optimistic and put my money on a month.

Overheard Conversations At My House...

Amy: Awww, my baby bought his first cd...

Jack: Yeah, my dad wanted it to be something good.

Amy: It never is...

Jack: Wow, these things are hard to open...I think I'm going to chip my nailpolish.

Amy: Yeah, things never really turn out how we think they will...

Let them eat cake...

So my father came over for Christmas and we decided it would be a really good idea to get a Buttercream cake from our favorite bakery...Buttercream! Note...the Lego guy is for scale...it was a HUGE cake.

We sent a big chunk home with Dad...and Todd and I spent the next few days eating this wonderful cake.

Jack came home and we were nice enough to save him a piece...here's the conversation that followed...

Jack: I'm really full from dinner, I don't think I can eat cake...

Todd: I'll eat it for him.

Amy: No, you can save it for breakfast. There's nothing better than cake for breakfast, so long as you also eat a banana. (note, the cake for breakfast post)

The next morning...

Jack: Oh, no, I've become one of THOSE people.

Amy: What are you talking about...?

Jack: I like the cake, but not the frosting. It's like eating a stick of butter.

Amy: You say that like it's a bad thing! I call dibs on the frosting...eat your banana.

Although, I will note that eating buttercream frosting at 6:45am leaves one feeling rather sick about an hour later.

Oh well, it was worth it.

Mmmm, cake.

The Annual Hunt...


Here is Jack, our photographer...note the blaze orange to prevent being accidentally shot at...

We had a new addition to the hunt this year...Beckham was proudly wearing his orange, and wondering what in God's name we were doing...

Jack calls this one "Wilderness Barbie". We got Ginger her own coat, though she was not happy to be walking in the snow, so the little princess got carried.

Potential victims...

Our fearless guide...ok, I didn't get the booty shot this year because he was wearing a snow suit and you really couldn't tell it what was in the picture. I was kind of impressed because here, it almost looks like he's smiling...almost

I then realized I never took a picture of the tree, so I just snapped this one. Christmas is over, all the presents are gone, and I think I need to water the tree...

Merry Christmas!

One middle aged mom and two 10 year old boys decide to go sledding after dinner,
therefore, in the dark...

After an hour or so, a dozen trips up the hill, 4 white washed wipe outs for the mom, and the building of one jump, "If we pee on it, I bet it would freeze solid!," they decide to call it a day...or...night.

I think I'm good for another 2-3 years...

My little boy...


Ok, so this was Halloween, but we did have to have the "no you cannot wear "guy-liner" to school discussion". I'm thinking the nuns might object to 5th graders wearing black eyeliner, especially if the boys are beating the girls to it...

Amy: When I imagined bonding with my son, I really didn't think it involved low lights and black nail polish.

Jack: (Sitting across from me with foils in his hair and wet black fingernails) Mom, this is so awesome! Criss Angel is my new hero. He is Goth, with attitude.

Amy: Does your dad go for this? I just can't imagine he does...

Jack: No, he just uses all of the neighbor's nail polish remover.

Amy: On some sick level, I love that...

French

Jack: Since I am taking French, I think we need to kiss like the French do...

Amy: Um, no, really, I don't think we do...that's gross and wrong on so many levels.

Jack: Why is kissing on both cheeks gross?

Amy: Oh...um...I didn't realize that's what you meant...sure, that sounds great, we'll start doing that.

Jack: What did you think I meant?

Amy: Um, never mind.

Our Trip to Yosemite...

One Recreational Vehicle
Two Kids
One Wii
One Nintendo DS
Two laptops
One Class of Homework: Intermediate Accounting
5000 miles
10 days
No Deaths

Don't we almost look happy?

Ross was not suffering from boredom much...he was a trooper.

The Redwood Forest and a REALLY big tree.

I'm not sure why he chose to play UNDER the table...

Almost looks like Banff, doesn't it?

Todd drove all 5000 miles, bless his heart.
There is NO WAY I was going to drive that thing. EEK!

Overheard conversations over email at my house...

Todd

Please, Please, Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee can we get one. http://minneapolis...

Jul 6 (1 day ago)

ToddLoading...

Jul 6 (1 day ago)

Todd to me

Reply

Please, Please, Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee can we get one.

Ad from Craigslist:

amy swenson to Todd

Reply

hell no

Todd to me

Reply

I don't care what you say I'm getting at least 1. Where should we put her? I'm thinking on the wall by our wedding picture.

Email Todd sent:

From: Todd
Subject: Tanned Grey Squirrel Hide - $24 (Bemidji, MN)

Hi

Do you have more than 1?

Thanks
Todd

Reply:

I just checked with my boyfriend who is the one that tans then, we have 10 hides and more to be done! We also have a tanned rabbit fur (it only has 1 ear though) How many were you thinking about purchasing?
Amanda

Todd to me

Reply

I really want the 1 eared bunny! Please? Please I'll be good!!!

amy swenson to Todd

Reply

You can sleep with it on your side of the bed, but I won't blame Ginger when she eats it.

Todd to me

Reply

I now know what I'm getting everyone for Christmas.